So, it feels like I've been doing this FOR-EV-ER!
Today was tough. I had decided that I needed a Ice Cream Sandwich from Cold Stone Creamery. I'd convinced myself that I could do this if I followed one of the following rules:
1. I didn't eat anything else for the rest of the day.
2. If tomorrow, my cheat day, I neglected to partake in one item that I had planned too.
3. I called my mother and she agreed that I deserved to have something good since I've been strict at following the diet, even though everyone else around me is eating pizza and garlic-butter-cheese sticks, and Dr. Pepper and fried chicken and Happy meals from McDonalds!
So, I analyzed each of the above rules I'd come up with--while driving to Cold Stone Creamery-- and here is what I determined:
1. Probably not feasible since I only had an orange for breakfast. So, I most likely am going to feel like eating at least one of my cats by the time I get off work and I love my cats, they are like my children and eating babies is wrong-- so this was decidedly not the way to go. On to rule 2....
2. This was covered in fail sauce the second I thought of it because tomorrow I am going to a party with tons of mouth watering culinary delights never before tasted by my buds and I cannot deny them. That just leaves rule 3.
3.I called my mom--while sitting in front of Cold Stone Creamery--fully aware that in the past she has always agreed that I do deserve some happiness, especially after all I go through and how tough I've been and of course she is going to help me come up with a reason or even several that will make my venture into the Creamery's wonderland of goodness legal.
So, I call her up and tell her where I am at and everything was kind of a blur as to what I actually said because my head was swimming with sugary visions and the FACT that any second now I would be walking through those brilliantly advertised doors and biting into the most glorious thing the world has ever tasted, this call was really just a precursor a simple bit of red tape in which mere seconds from now I would have the signature for the go-ahead and then she said the magic words!....
Okay I don't really recall what they were, but basically it was "No" and something to the effect of "drive away" and then being made aware of where I really was, "walk away"...
So, instead I got soup or really it should be called broth with vegetables and about four pieces of meat the size of my thumb. They said it was for two, but my stomach laughed at them.
About two hours later my office has a birthday party and brings in white chocolate cheesecake with raspberry sauce, real whipped cream, dark chocolate graham cracker crust and shavings of white chocolate... and oh no that wasn't enough temptation apparently! They also brought in a double dark chocolate cheesecake with a white chocolate layer, dark fudge icing dollops and covered in mini chocolate chips!!!!!
Somehow I resisted without fainting from the anxiety...
Then I went to the store and the chicken strips were literally calling my name-- or at least that's what they seemed to be doing.
I am so distraught right now that I can't even think about what to eat tonight. My plan is to wait until midnight and then eat both slices of the cheesecake I brought home from work. I had planned on sharing them tomorrow, but I don't think that is a sane persons plan do you?
And that isn't all. Now I was fully aware that this meal plan was supposed to regulate sugar levels, thyroid issue and metabolism, what I did NOT expect was it to regulate my hormones. You may wan to skip this part if you don't want to hear about women issues....
I gave you some space just in case.
So, I started my cycle about day 6 and it hasn't stopped!!! Now I realize that a normal cycle is typically seven days, but that it is a heck of a lot when you haven't had one in a YEAR! Even in the priior year I had it maybe for five days TOTAL...the entire year! This has been going on for several years. Not from drugs or birth control, but just because my system is jacked up with PCOS, which BTW is when I began retaining all this weight. So, yeah, guess it straightens out hormones too? Anyway, hence the reason why I've been in pain, feeling crappy and talking myself out of chocolate every five seconds. Kind of failed on that last night though because I found some mini chocolate chips in the fridge and ate about an 1/8 of a cup. Not bad I suppose since I wanted to just pour the bag into my mouth, but still I really shouldn't have. So there's my update.
Enjoy!
Today was tough. I had decided that I needed a Ice Cream Sandwich from Cold Stone Creamery. I'd convinced myself that I could do this if I followed one of the following rules:
1. I didn't eat anything else for the rest of the day.
2. If tomorrow, my cheat day, I neglected to partake in one item that I had planned too.
3. I called my mother and she agreed that I deserved to have something good since I've been strict at following the diet, even though everyone else around me is eating pizza and garlic-butter-cheese sticks, and Dr. Pepper and fried chicken and Happy meals from McDonalds!
So, I analyzed each of the above rules I'd come up with--while driving to Cold Stone Creamery-- and here is what I determined:
1. Probably not feasible since I only had an orange for breakfast. So, I most likely am going to feel like eating at least one of my cats by the time I get off work and I love my cats, they are like my children and eating babies is wrong-- so this was decidedly not the way to go. On to rule 2....
2. This was covered in fail sauce the second I thought of it because tomorrow I am going to a party with tons of mouth watering culinary delights never before tasted by my buds and I cannot deny them. That just leaves rule 3.
3.I called my mom--while sitting in front of Cold Stone Creamery--fully aware that in the past she has always agreed that I do deserve some happiness, especially after all I go through and how tough I've been and of course she is going to help me come up with a reason or even several that will make my venture into the Creamery's wonderland of goodness legal.
So, I call her up and tell her where I am at and everything was kind of a blur as to what I actually said because my head was swimming with sugary visions and the FACT that any second now I would be walking through those brilliantly advertised doors and biting into the most glorious thing the world has ever tasted, this call was really just a precursor a simple bit of red tape in which mere seconds from now I would have the signature for the go-ahead and then she said the magic words!....
Okay I don't really recall what they were, but basically it was "No" and something to the effect of "drive away" and then being made aware of where I really was, "walk away"...
So, instead I got soup or really it should be called broth with vegetables and about four pieces of meat the size of my thumb. They said it was for two, but my stomach laughed at them.
About two hours later my office has a birthday party and brings in white chocolate cheesecake with raspberry sauce, real whipped cream, dark chocolate graham cracker crust and shavings of white chocolate... and oh no that wasn't enough temptation apparently! They also brought in a double dark chocolate cheesecake with a white chocolate layer, dark fudge icing dollops and covered in mini chocolate chips!!!!!
Somehow I resisted without fainting from the anxiety...
Then I went to the store and the chicken strips were literally calling my name-- or at least that's what they seemed to be doing.
I am so distraught right now that I can't even think about what to eat tonight. My plan is to wait until midnight and then eat both slices of the cheesecake I brought home from work. I had planned on sharing them tomorrow, but I don't think that is a sane persons plan do you?
And that isn't all. Now I was fully aware that this meal plan was supposed to regulate sugar levels, thyroid issue and metabolism, what I did NOT expect was it to regulate my hormones. You may wan to skip this part if you don't want to hear about women issues....
I gave you some space just in case.
So, I started my cycle about day 6 and it hasn't stopped!!! Now I realize that a normal cycle is typically seven days, but that it is a heck of a lot when you haven't had one in a YEAR! Even in the priior year I had it maybe for five days TOTAL...the entire year! This has been going on for several years. Not from drugs or birth control, but just because my system is jacked up with PCOS, which BTW is when I began retaining all this weight. So, yeah, guess it straightens out hormones too? Anyway, hence the reason why I've been in pain, feeling crappy and talking myself out of chocolate every five seconds. Kind of failed on that last night though because I found some mini chocolate chips in the fridge and ate about an 1/8 of a cup. Not bad I suppose since I wanted to just pour the bag into my mouth, but still I really shouldn't have. So there's my update.
Enjoy!
