Well it certainly can make you feel that way. It clouds your judgment and makes all the warning signs seem like adorable dust-bunnies in the road that you can easily step over and by the time you realize that your vision has been sabotaged by hormones you've just fell off the cliff and broken your heart!
In church today they talked about the adolescent mind and how it was thought that children learned everything they were going to by the age of 10.
We learned that while it my be true that the foundation and tools of learning are set in these years the next important stint of brain growth is between the ages of 10 and 20.
In the second decade of life the human mind begins to form organization skills based off of examples.
From 10-12 these example come from family, teachers and other adult contact. At 13 the adolescent mind begins to put aside family and seek their peers examples.
This is why it is of extreme importance that the adults at home be an anchor for the adolescent.
The speaker talked about a friend who she used to work with at a Teen Center. Her friend taught computer skills and she found out an interesting correlation in young girls. Girls who had been sexually active with many partners were also the girls who did not follow through with the program.
Another correlation was found that girls who did not have a positive parental male relationship would seek the love and acceptance from other males.
This is why it is of the utmost importance that an adolescent girl has a good foundation of intimacy with her parents. The power of parental touch can instill a foundation of belonging, love and intimacy.
The body and soul craves acceptance and touch. Children who have a positive model for and receive appropriate parental intimacy grow to be healthy, confident and strong in the knowledge of self-worth, self-respect and are less apt to seek intimacy elsewhere in a possible unhealthy relationship.
A question was asked of 48 male pedophiles from 4 institutions in the state of Missouri,
"What kind of child would you not go after?"
All 48 pedophiles gave the same answer,
They would not go after a child who's parents were involved with them. The ratio of children without parent involvement is astounding. The amount of children that run in the streets unattended is rampant. There is no reason for a pedophile to go after a child who has the support of protectors when there are hundreds of children without such support to choose from.
Children who have the support of parents do not run the streets-- their parents know where they are at all times.
It is not a loving statement to say, "I trust my child." A child is still experiencing life and making decisions on what their peers and family show them is right. To leave a child to the mercy and influence of their confusing hormonal urges is a form of neglect.
An adolescent is moving from a life of instant gratification to one of rules and delayed gratification. They can no longer cry and instantly have a bottle to appease their need. Now they must learn to gain a respect for themselves and a sense of self-worth by weighing what is best for their future and making a choice on how to go about working to have a lasting/ long-term outcome.
A child who gets instant gratification becomes an adult who cannot be satisfied with their life. They will forever be looking for something to fill the vacuum in their soul. Time and care must be taken to fill the heart and life of a child with positive long-reaching goals and rewards. A child who does not have the benefit of a loving parent to help them fill their lives with the anchors of commitment, determination, and personal growth through overcoming obstacles with loving support creates an empty soul--the result is a vacuum.
Nature abhors a vacuum and it must be filled. A starved soul will suck in the first things that bring a moment of gratification. A child will find themselves satisfied for a substitute that is of significant lesser value because settling is better than being empty.
This is the time to instill in them lessons that will affect their self-esteem and create a pattern of healthy relationships that will last into adulthood.
It is not too late to model a sexually healthy relationship.This does not include a string of live ins or arguments without respect, healthy communication, compromise, resolution and commitment. It does require openness, honesty, teamwork, worthiness of trust, and lasting love.
To be an anchor is simple. Live the life you would wish for your children when they are adults and though your child will continue to listen to their peers when they come home they will always have an example of what the right choices in life are.
Decide now to stick to the rules of a Home:
1. Home is where confidences are kept and respected.
2. Home has no room for judgement.
3. Home is a haven from the stresses, worries and tragedies of life.
4. Home is where you can find a solid anchor of what is right.
5. Home is where you will always find people who love you unconditionally and who are determined to help you have a fulfilling life.
In church today they talked about the adolescent mind and how it was thought that children learned everything they were going to by the age of 10.
We learned that while it my be true that the foundation and tools of learning are set in these years the next important stint of brain growth is between the ages of 10 and 20.
In the second decade of life the human mind begins to form organization skills based off of examples.
From 10-12 these example come from family, teachers and other adult contact. At 13 the adolescent mind begins to put aside family and seek their peers examples.
This is why it is of extreme importance that the adults at home be an anchor for the adolescent.
The speaker talked about a friend who she used to work with at a Teen Center. Her friend taught computer skills and she found out an interesting correlation in young girls. Girls who had been sexually active with many partners were also the girls who did not follow through with the program.
Another correlation was found that girls who did not have a positive parental male relationship would seek the love and acceptance from other males.
This is why it is of the utmost importance that an adolescent girl has a good foundation of intimacy with her parents. The power of parental touch can instill a foundation of belonging, love and intimacy.
The body and soul craves acceptance and touch. Children who have a positive model for and receive appropriate parental intimacy grow to be healthy, confident and strong in the knowledge of self-worth, self-respect and are less apt to seek intimacy elsewhere in a possible unhealthy relationship.
A question was asked of 48 male pedophiles from 4 institutions in the state of Missouri,
"What kind of child would you not go after?"
All 48 pedophiles gave the same answer,
They would not go after a child who's parents were involved with them. The ratio of children without parent involvement is astounding. The amount of children that run in the streets unattended is rampant. There is no reason for a pedophile to go after a child who has the support of protectors when there are hundreds of children without such support to choose from.
Children who have the support of parents do not run the streets-- their parents know where they are at all times.
It is not a loving statement to say, "I trust my child." A child is still experiencing life and making decisions on what their peers and family show them is right. To leave a child to the mercy and influence of their confusing hormonal urges is a form of neglect.
An adolescent is moving from a life of instant gratification to one of rules and delayed gratification. They can no longer cry and instantly have a bottle to appease their need. Now they must learn to gain a respect for themselves and a sense of self-worth by weighing what is best for their future and making a choice on how to go about working to have a lasting/ long-term outcome.
A child who gets instant gratification becomes an adult who cannot be satisfied with their life. They will forever be looking for something to fill the vacuum in their soul. Time and care must be taken to fill the heart and life of a child with positive long-reaching goals and rewards. A child who does not have the benefit of a loving parent to help them fill their lives with the anchors of commitment, determination, and personal growth through overcoming obstacles with loving support creates an empty soul--the result is a vacuum.
Nature abhors a vacuum and it must be filled. A starved soul will suck in the first things that bring a moment of gratification. A child will find themselves satisfied for a substitute that is of significant lesser value because settling is better than being empty.
This is the time to instill in them lessons that will affect their self-esteem and create a pattern of healthy relationships that will last into adulthood.
It is not too late to model a sexually healthy relationship.This does not include a string of live ins or arguments without respect, healthy communication, compromise, resolution and commitment. It does require openness, honesty, teamwork, worthiness of trust, and lasting love.
To be an anchor is simple. Live the life you would wish for your children when they are adults and though your child will continue to listen to their peers when they come home they will always have an example of what the right choices in life are.
Decide now to stick to the rules of a Home:
1. Home is where confidences are kept and respected.
2. Home has no room for judgement.
3. Home is a haven from the stresses, worries and tragedies of life.
4. Home is where you can find a solid anchor of what is right.
5. Home is where you will always find people who love you unconditionally and who are determined to help you have a fulfilling life.
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