Finding what you love! Skills for a Happy, Fulfilling Career & A Meaningful Life!

You may ask why is it important to find what you love. Aside from the obvious reasons of knowing yourself and finding joy.  It is crucial for longevity, inner peace, success and unfettered happiness.

So, here are the steps to discovering the answer to this all important question. You may be surprised as to what you find. There may be things that you never would have considered without this process.

I like to go through this about once every two years, just to make sure my interests haven't changed. You may find if helpful to go through once a year. It is important to check back when big changes happen in your life. You may gain more knowledge, skills, talents, a shift in what's important to you or what motivates you. The key here is that you don't ignore the signs of discontent. If you aren't joyful in your life, then your spirit is demanding a change.

Below are a series of questions. This is NOT a graded test. There is no wrong answer, so be honest with yourself. Often the first response is the best one, but you can do this process more than once. Just make sure that you are answering for what you want not what you believe is expected from someone else.

Often, we tend to absorb the wishes of others.

The classic example is of someone who grew up with their father being a doctor and all their life they've been taught that the only noble and right course for them to take in life is to aspire to become a doctor.

This process asks that you put aside all expectations and listen to your heart. Happy hunting!

Step 1: What are your current interests?

Ex. Traveling around the world and buying antiques for people or writing itineraries for hidden places to visit, book collecting for a bookstore of forgotten tomes, starting an animal sanctuary for owls and wolves, repainting old furniture, starting a sanctuary for people in need, etc..

Step 2: In book stores you naturally gravitate to which section and what type of books?

Ex. New age, myths, health alternatives, YA fiction, etc…

Step 3: What do people praise you on?

Ex. My cooking, my hair, my creativity, my drinks, my ability to make people feel comfortable, etc…

Step 4: As a child you were interested in…

Ex. Making up stories, saving and caring for animals, finding fairies, driving an air-boat, etc…

Step 5: As a child people praised you on…

Ex. Being polite, listening, being good with animals, having an active imagination.

Step 6: As a child what did your teachers and parents say you had a skill or knack for? (You may need to ask these people to find out.)

Ex. Playing the piano, telling stories, being a good conversationalist, etc…

Step 7: What do people say you have a skill or knack for now?

Ex. The ability to heal just by talking to someone, patience, giving comfort, helping people to see who they really are, seeing things in a unique way, etc…

Step 8: What are your skills?

Ex. Writing, painting, cooking, massage, listening to give people a different perspective, etc…

Step 9: Things that you didn’t like about your jobs…

Ex. Uniforms, waiting for people to show up, being mistreated, not being able to leave, no vacation, monotony, standing, Bob, etc…

Step 10: How are you best motivated?

Ex. Praise, charting and seeing the success and progress I’ve made, rewards, achieving goals, optimism rather than criticism-make a positive spin, knowing I’m valued and a lot a people can’t do what I can, deadlines far in advance, making really good money J, exciting and unique experiences, allowed to be creative, etc…

Great! Good job! Almost done!

Now go through steps 1-8 and find correlating themes and circle the key word(s) for each. I will call this Process 1 for example’s sake.

Process 2 is if you are having trouble with Process 1. Start with the first subject and go through the steps 1-8 and write down any words that correlate with that theme.

Below I have used my examples from above to show you how this would look.

Process 1:

Ex. I would circle:

Step 1: writing, books

Step 2: new age, myths, YA fiction

Step 3: creativity

Step 4: stories

Step 5: imagination

Step 6: stories

Step 7: seeing things in a unique way

Step 8: writing

Process 2:

Step 1: Travel, writing

Step 2: none

Step 3: creativity

Step 4: stories

Step 5: imagination

Step 6: stories, conversationalist

Step 7: seeing things in a unique way

Step 8: writing, giving people a different perspective

From what I’ve found above, I want to either write about fiction from a new age perspective or I want to be a travel writer and give people a unique experience through my travels, but not as much as being a fiction writer.

The other way this could have gone is (Again using correlating themes. You get to decide which answers are related.):

Process 1:

Step 1: Start a sanctuary

Step 2: Alternative Health

Step 3: Make people feel comfortable

Step 4: Saving & Caring

Step 5: Listening

Step 6: Good conversationalist

Step 7: Talking , Comfort, Healing

Step 8: Massage, Listening

Process 2:

Step 1: repainting old furniture

Step 2: none

Step 3: creativity

Step 4: none

Step 5: imagination

Step 6: none

Step 7: seeing things in a unique way

Step 8: painting

So, from the second go through of Process 1, we can see that I might also enjoy being a counselor for alternative healing.

We can see in Process 2 that I may like being a decorator or a painter/ artist, but there isn’t enough to support a long lasting enjoyment. ( note all the None's.)

I hope you can get an idea of what I’m driving at.

You want to go through this thoroughly. After each process summarize your findings in one sentence. Read each summary and put a check mark next to the summary for each item in Steps 1 and 10 that pertains. Do the same for the pertaining items in Step 9, only put an X next to the summary instead.

If you really want to get analytical assign a 1-10 scale next to each item in the Steps 1, 9 and 10. For example let’s say you dislike talking to people, but you'll do it if you have to... that would be a 2.

Then, let say you abhor monotony that would be a 10. You like painting= 3 you love to travel= 10. 

You see the pros scale is 1 for least liked, 10 for most liked. On the cons it would be 1 for the least hated, 10 for the most hated.

With this method you can easily weigh the pros against the cons.

Ex. From the summary: I want to be a traveling writer.

Pros-

Travel =9

Far in advance deadlines= 4

Making really good money= 10

Exciting & unique experiences=10

Achieving goals=8

Charting progress=5

Creative License=10

Total pro=56

Cons-

Standing=3

Waiting =5

Not being able to leave=6

Total cons- 14

Balance= 42

The pros outweigh the cons by 60%. *

Though you may dislike talking to people the traveling would be worth it and you may even grow to enjoy the socializing part of the job.

Then ask yourself, “What would I love to do on a daily basis using my skills, interests and talents that will be of great value to others?”

Choose the theme that is most appealing. You can combine several themes into one idea.

The point is to choose the one that will glean the greatest satisfaction,  for yourself and  others.

Please comment on your findings! I am so interested to know what you’ve discovered!

 *for anyone who wants to know how I came up with this %.  Take both numbers and add them. 56 + 14= 70. Then take the balance and divide by the result. 42 /70= 60%

 If you noticed I did NOT have any math skills in my examples. So, if the math is wrong you can blame my brother, Link. -he actually made me put this clause in here. Not sure if he is being nice or just wants to take credit for his mad math skills.